Late Night Conversation

I should be asleep right now, but for some reason I won't let myself turn off the lights and lay down. I do this quite often. I'm tired and would like to get some rest before what will surely be a long day tomorrow, but there's something that keeps me up. It's almost like I'll be missing out on something if I sleep. What could I be missing out on, though? DVDs that I can watch anytime, another reality show, a book that always seems lose priority to something else. I guess now I'm trying to find something to look forward to for the next few months. Having my lovely lady friend here had been the big landmark for the last couple months and that has now come and gone (it was great and I'll talk more about it some other time). The search is on, though, for a new goal. Sure, I have school, a country to explore, a band, and new friends, but I still feel like something is missing. Sometimes people ask me "why Korea?" and I usually say, "why not," or give a long explanation of how it makes sense financially and personally. I'm starting to really question why I came here and am having trouble finding any quality reasons for my decision. Don't misinterpret things, I do not regret my decision. I just have no clue why I'm here. I'll get some teaching experience and make some good friends, but part of me just wants to be back in San Francisco eating burritos and playing funky music. However, I have also gained perspective on SF and have decided that it's not that great. I still am quite fond of it, but I don't miss all of the pretentious know-it-alls that are too cool for school. I always felt like there was an attitude among people in that city that they were better than anyone who doesn't live there. I'm sure I had that attitude at times.
Without blabbering any more than I already have, I guess the point that I'm trying to make is that there is no perfect situation. There will always be something that is bothersome, some sacrifices that have to be made, and the grass will always be greener somewhere else. There are things that really bug me about this place and sometimes I feel like quitting, but there are also some great moments here that will keep coming. I just have to find another spot in the timeline that can serve as the light at the end of a sometimes pitch black and empty tunnel.